Friday, July 27, 2007

NOOOOOO!



Which Office Character Are You?

You are Ryan. You are extremely smart and perceptive, and it irritates you to no end when inferior people try to tell you what to do. Sometimes, though, your critical eye makes you come off as aloof and bitter to others, and it may take awhile for people to get to know you.
Find Your Character @ BrainFall.com



although, am I right or wrong that this quiz result makes Ryan sound like waaaaaay less of a douche than he actually is on the show?

Monday, July 9, 2007

Another Winner!

Apparently, being interviewed by The Globe about Harry Potter is AWESOME creep bait.

Like this guy:




...who just sent me a message on facebook. Granted, he does not take the "sincere" route preferred by ESL students the world over of admitting he messaged me because he thinks I'm cute, so perhaps he really *is* only interested in knowing:

How on earth do you land a mugshot on the front page!?! Nice.

But when someone's profile picture depicts them RIDING A SADDLE making a CRAZY FACE in what I can only describe as a Conservative Asshole Polo Shirt (tm), this is one of those situations where you run first, and ponder later.

Famous!


Yes, that's right folks- I am officially famous. I am on the cover of today's Boston Globe. Below the fold, but still. Read the online article here!

So far, this article has:

a) tempted hostility from my students at Tenacity, by misrepresenting comments I made, as a Harry Potter fan, about the pluses and minuses of the books generally as comments I made, as some kind of youth literacy expert, about the tendencies of my actual students. Thankfully this tempted hostility has yet to manifest itself. However, I fear the kids are merely waiting until they have their weapon of choice (individual copies of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, of course) to fall upon me en masse and bludgeon me to death. Only time will tell.

b) led to some deeply creepy ESL student from Somerville attempting to pick me up through Amazon. He said, and I do quote, that I have beautiful eyes. Because THAT'S original. You know he's probably like 42 and still living in his mother's basement. I know that The Girl's Guide to Life says that saying no to one date is saying NO to dating but... I'm justified in this case, I think.

Kerry and I agree that in the romantic comedy version of my life, I'm making a serious error in judgment, because obviously my ESL student is played by like, some very attractive foreign guy, like Diego Luna, and he and I are meant to have hilarious language mix-ups, fantastic sex, a lovely wedding, and adorable babies (to roll photo album style through the credits).

However, in the suspense/horror movie version of my life, I should... basically have contacted the cops. Yesterday. Because he is clearly going to stalk and maim me. And, when you think about it,that's really the only thing the Harry Potter series is missing- a tied-in serial killing spree.

Sunday, July 8, 2007

What Comes of Mixing Good Scottish Stock with... French Blood

While in the past, the "Willison tribe" was decribed as "a healthy minded and industrious race" who had, during their "long residence in Western Maryland," "never yet occupied a Suite of Rooms at the County Home or retired to an asylum," ever since our miscegentation with those French/German rapscallions, the Shaners, we've become stark raving loonies, and are likely to begin populating the asylums of the Greater Boston area any day now. 

I love googling myself. In other news, I may or may not be a little related to Martha Washington. 

The Funny Things You Find Cleaning Your Room...

When your mom is slightly crazy and never throws anything away:

A copy of The Boston Globe Magazine from November 1993, with a cover story about the former headmaster of your high school.

The coverstory's original title?

Tough Love at Latin.

What your THEN-42-YEAR OLD mother has changed it to:

Tough SHIT (this is on a little piece of white paper, meticulously cut out and SHIT is not just capitals, but in square bubble letters) at Latin. 

When I first saw this, I assumed it was something Robert had done. Then I showed it to my mom, who is now 56, and she readily owned that the culprit was she. She remains quite proud of her work.